Florida Court Sets Atheist Holy Day

In Florida , an atheist created a case against the upcoming Easter and 2 Passover Holy days.  He hired an attorney to bring a discrimination case against Christians and Jews and observances of their holy days.  The argument was that it was unfair that atheists had no such recognized days.
The case was brought before a judge.  After listening to the passionate presentation by the lawyer, the judge banged his gavel declaring, “Case dismissed!”
The lawyer immediately stood objecting to the ruling saying, “Your honor, How can you possibly dismiss this case?  The Christians have Christmas, Easter and others.  The Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah, yet my client and all other atheists have no such holidays…”
The judge leaned forward in his chair saying, “But you do. Your client, counsel, is woefully ignorant.”
The lawyer said, “Your Honor, we are unaware of any special observance or holiday for atheists.”
The judge said, “The calendar says April 1st is April Fools Day. Psalm 14:1 states, ‘The fool says in his heart, there is no God.’  Thus, it is the opinion of this court, that, if your client says there is no God, then he is a fool. Therefore, April 1st is his day. Court is adjourned.”
You gotta love a Judge that knows his scripture!

Me: Of course he’s gonna cover his ass!!

Ben: Because he wants yours!

Clinton: You have to stop trying to compete with 25 year-olds.  They always win.

Stacey: They always win. BITCHES!

[talking about a motor scooter]

Paul Sr: I’m talking about putting a rack up here.

Mikey: Can we put Afganistan up there instead?

Joel: Can I eat these hearts?

Jon: No, they’re paper hearts.

Joel: Can I try to eat them?

Person 1 - I’m pretty sure I can be pretty skanky, I just choose not to let it out.

Person 2 - I guess I’m just comfortable with my inner skank.

She’s leaving!! And taking her hair with her!!

Beckett: What do you got up your sleeves?

Castle: Aside from my muscular arms?